"I started using football patches and they worked so well, I decided to sell them. They really work. Try them and you will see for yourself." Steve Watson, footy4kids

There are a number of problems which may occur over the course of a season due to the behaviour of players and parents. These include attendance problems; disruptions/misconduct during practice or games; "overly-helpful" parents; and parents who are chronic gripers.

Most of the problems with parents can be remedied by having a pre-season meeting where everyone can discuss and agree appropriate codes of conduct.

But failure to overcome players' behavioural difficulties are why most coaches to decide to give up coaching, so it is very important to learn how to deal with them. The most effective way of doing this is by using 'positive reinforcement'.

Positive reinforcement

"If a child lives with approval, he learns to live with himself."
Dorothy Law Nolte

Positive reinforcement is the most effective way of encouraging good behaviour, improving performance and raising players' self esteem. And the good thing is that it's easy to do! All you need to do is recognise and reward the behaviour you want to see - teamwork, running off the ball, powerful shots, good attitude or whatever you want. And football patches are the ideal way of doing this. They are visually appealing, desirable and are given to the child by one of their significant others' - you, the coach!

It is important that the patches are given promptly and publicly and that all children - not just the better players - have a chance to earn one. So I suggest you award a certain patch (I give a blue football) for improvement and a gold coloured star for 'good attitude' at training or in matches (or a combination of the the two).

If you do this, I promise you will experience less disruption at training, your players will learn more and you will win more matches.

Some more tips

Using "the Voice" and "the Look" from footy4kids

It's important for players to be able to recognize by your tone of voice and your manner when you intend a no-nonsense directive, or are drawing a boundary which they try to cross at their peril. Yelling does not work. Use a firm voice and a firm look, and DEMAND attention. Make it clear that this is non-negotiable - and your chances that they will listen increase substantially. Watch for their reaction, however. It is easy to scare little ones with a tone of voice which might induce teenagers to slowly think about complying - so adjust to your audience.
 

The Art of Refocusing Attention

Sometimes a quick, firm word in passing is enough to get things back on track without stopping an ongoing activity. If this doesn't work, don't try to yell or frantically run around to get the attention of the players. STOP the group, DEMAND that they all stop talking and look at you, and WAIT until everyone does so before even trying to start with the substance of your remarks. Using "the Voice", say something like: "Eyes on me. Now."

If someone starts clowning or chatting in the background after you start trying to talk substance, STOP! Firmly re-demand silence before continuing. Keep doing this until they shut up, even if you spend 20 minutes on a 30 second announcement. Eventually, the other players will start to tell this player to be quiet, because they will get bored standing around. When the disruptive one starts to get negative attention from his peers, the behaviour tends to cease quickly.

And don't forget to reward the behaviour that you want too see. If talking while you're talking is a problem, make sure you publicly award a patch to the child that listens most attentively.
Choose Your Battles Wisely

Remember that all children misbehave at times. If the child is not normally disruptive or if the disruption is not serious - and is quickly abandoned with a quiet word from you, there is no reason to make a big deal over it.

If you are too stern, and use the proverbial cannon to deal with a small gnat of an offence, this causes two problems. First, the compliant players will start to fear you - and will become so upset by any correction from you that they will tend to freeze up and become afraid to make mistakes for fear of displeasing you (so they won't learn very well). Secondly, the more spirited or defiant players will figure out that you have already used up all of your ammunition on a trivial offence - so they won't see any reason why they shouldn't commit HUGE offences if the punishment is going to be the same anyway. As a result, it is not uncommon to find utter chaos when the coach is not using good judgement on when/how/why/where to punish offences.

how to use football patches - a free guide